Author: thelimeartexperiment

My life fell apart when I made the decision that psychology was how I was going to become a healer. It was not just a future career for me but a calling. However, I had heard many horror stories from people around me who had been disappointed by psychologists, which further sowed distrust towards the industry. I wanted to be different. An effective therapist who makes their clients feel safe and unjudged like we were supposed to.

As I progressed through my studies, I realised that it was easier said than done. I was a broken person. For most people, their early 20s are a time of building a life but for me, my early 20s were a period of shedding. If I was going to become a healer, first I had to heal myself. I was extremely aware of how trauma is a cycle, even when I did not have a vocabulary to describe it. Nobody spoke about trauma before 2021, but everyone described their traumatic experience.

When I was 24-25, I experienced events that shook me to my core and made me question whether I would be able to do this work without harming others. I ended up taking a long pause from my studies because I was struggling to function. It was not only the events that I was involved in that made me pause. I was also slowly realising that I had some undiscovered issues that were starting to become apparent.

The next few years would be a period of self-discovery. I failed so many times and felt a lot of shame. People around were in great careers and getting married, here I was still floating through life. It was not because of a lack of trying, I knew what I wanted in life and I always go for what I want. I experienced multiple disappointments that caused me to a detour. I didn’t have a conventional progression through my life. I never had conventional ideas or desires.

At times I wish I wanted what everyone else wanted. I tried. I tried to get married multiple times but it was always such a triggering experience and I kept attracting emotionally unavailable who had intense trauma. I tried building a career and realised that I was not suited for the career that I tried to build. There were also world events that felt like a meteor struck everyone’s plans.

Lockdown was such a tower moment for me, as it was for everyone. I was supposed to start a new life in 2020. After 2021, I felt like every road I tried to turn to was blocked and I was stuck in the middle of a crossroad. I did not give up. I started focusing on finding what was blocking my path, including getting a diagnosis for my neurological issues. I went to therapy and I started structuring my life around my brain. I also got a PCOS diagnosis which explained a lot about my my physical health.

My failures were not my fault, they were due to aspects of my life that I had no control over. I still felt like I was not trying hard enough though. When I started understanding my body and mind, I began healing my mental health. I had suicidal ideation for most of my life which got worse in 2021. I did not choose to live because I wanted to. I had witnessed a suicide attempt before and I did not want to inflict the same pain on others. I lived because I had no choice but to make returns on the investment that I was. 

I was born a month after my country was liberated and had always been aware that my generation was special. We were the hope of the country.  My every experience was weighed by the realisation that I was the first in my family to do a lot of things or have the childhood that I had. I needed to make them proud. That need to make others proud turned into a need to survive at least. 

I have no material achievements that I am proud of to show but I have done healing that no one around me has been able to achieve. I am very fortunate in many ways that I have been able to be comfortable and access the resources to focus on my healing and actually make progress. I don’t feel shame for my existence anymore, I am now looking forward to living. I have a strong sense that my life is not over because I don’t have a career and partner at 30. Instead, what I have will make sure that when I do have those things, I keep them. I have dreamt of days of waking up without the feeling of dread and I am actually able to complete tasks for once. I am not perfect, sometimes I fall into old habits but I don’t experience the thoughts and impulsions that I had before.

Everything happens in perfect timing when you set the intention to create the life that you want. Just because your life does not look like the people around you doesn’t mean that is less valid. You are supposed to be put through trials to prepare you for the life that you want, especially when you are dreaming of the extraordinary.

We’ve all heard the classic question: Do you see the glass as half empty or half full? Supposedly, the way you answer reveals a lot about your outlook on life. If you see it as half empty, you’re labeled a pessimist. If you see it as half full, you’re seen as an optimist.

Optimists often get all the praise. They’re the ones who, no matter what happens, seem to push through and always find a way. On the other hand, pessimists are thought to be stuck in fear, held back by negative thinking. But what if I told you both outlooks have value?

We often act like people need to fit into one box or the other, but the truth is, life requires a bit of both. It’s about balance. The first step in finding that balance is recognizing the constants. In the 

In today’s world, where everything can feel like a never-ending chaotic experience, how can anyone truly stay optimistic? When life feels overwhelming, relentless optimism can turn into emotional bypassing. You become so determined to “look on the bright side” that you lose touch with reality. On the flip side, too much pessimism is like sinking in quicksand—it holds you in place, making you believe there’s no way out.

The key is balance. Even in our darkest moments, hope exists. The human spirit is resilient. We have an incredible will to survive, and we fight for a better tomorrow even when today feels unbearable.

So, maybe the glass isn’t just half empty or half full. Maybe it’s exactly where it needs to be at the moment. And maybe we are, too.glass analogy, the constant is simple: there is a glass, and there’s water in it. Similarly, in life, certain things don’t change. You are human, you have basic needs, and the world moves in its own way regardless of how you feel about it.

Whether the glass is half empty or half full might depend on what you need at the time. If you’re thirsty, half full might feel like a blessing. If you’re performing a task that requires more, it might feel lacking. Life, like that glass, shifts depending on context and needs.

Take the saying “money can’t buy happiness,” for example. Recently, this idea has faced a lot of criticism, especially as life becomes harder for many people. For some, money can fix a lot of problems, but even then, there’s a point where it starts to bring its own complications. It’s all about balance.